


Breaking Point

by PerfectlyHopeless



Category: Dragon Age (Video Games), Dragon Age: Inquisition
Genre: Cullen knows constellations, Drabble, F/M, Fluff, Non-sexy sleeping together, One-Shot
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-09-25
Updated: 2015-09-25
Packaged: 2018-04-23 06:47:53
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,353
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4867121
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PerfectlyHopeless/pseuds/PerfectlyHopeless
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Even the Inquisitor has her moments of weakness.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Breaking Point

**Author's Note:**

> A drabble I started like 4 months ago and only recently finished. I hope you enjoy~

* * *

 

It had happened months ago. It should have been an afterthought at this point, just something to take as a warning, something that could happen. It shouldn’t have been an issue anymore.

But she was only human. She could feel herself bending, a breaking point always near.

Lori held herself together as she shook, arms wrapped around her legs while she tried to shake it off. Tried to shake off the memories that still haunted her.

Because everything was red. It sang a different song, darker and haunting. Even though she hadn’t been near it in a while she could feel it. She felt it crawling under her skin, but only sometimes. She could feel it driving her mad, her own paranoia terrifying her more than anything. She was far away from any sources of it, it couldn’t hurt her. She knew it couldn’t hurt her, but she knew things. Knew what could happen should she fail.

It had happened months ago, her trip through time with Dorian. Even still the nightmares came to her. The red lyrium taking hold of her companions, growing from them. Venatori and fade rifts everywhere, the Breach swallowing everything in it’s path. It made her insides twist. They’d only gone a year into the future. So much would and could happen if she wasn’t careful.

Lori held out a hand and tried to distract herself with her magic, making little stars and shapes out of ice. The green glow on her palm made her stomach lurch, however, and she found that her favorite distraction had been ruined for her.

The Magister, or whatever he was. Corypheus. He was out there. He’d come after her again, because she was the key to unraveling his plans. She’d foiled him in the beginning, and now she could close the rifts that he’d unleashed on the world.

It was only a mask she wore, being the Inquisitor. She did what was expected, and her luck had kept her alive so far. But now there were people relying on her. Not just friends, but whole nations and even races of people were watching her. Waiting for her next move, waiting for her to mess up.

She felt sick.

The little mage pushed her hair out of her face as she stood up, pulling a robe on around her small clothes as she left her quarters. Skyhold was sleeping now, but she had a feeling that there was someone who wouldn’t be.

Pushing strands of auburn hair away from her face, she swallowed as she stood at the door. A million thoughts flooded her mind as she knocked on the wood, the hollow sound echoing through the stone room behind it. Lori twisted the silver ring around her thumb to try and calm herself, the one thing she still had from the Circle. She’d become fixated on it when the door opened, surprising her and causing her to jump and yelp.

“Maker’s breath!” Cullen gasped, startled by Lori’s surprised reaction. His brows furrowed when his eyes adjusted to the low lighting. “Lori? What are you doing here?”

“I-I couldn’t sleep,” she said, suddenly feeling like a child again. “I was wondering if it’d be alright if I… slept with you in your bed this evening?”

Cullen was silent as he thought for a moment. He and Lori cared for each other immensely, loved each other even though neither of them had said it. But they’d never shared a bed before.

Lori got nervous at his silence. “I’m sorry, this was a dumb idea, I-...”

“No! I just…” Cullen had reached out for her and was now holding her hand, an action that gave them both pause. Lori met his gaze and Cullen felt his heart melt at the sight of her sweet brown eyes. “If you want, then I’d be happy to. Let you sleep here, that is…”

He trailed off. Lori had stepped closer into the doorway, still holding his hand as she stood on her toes to kiss him. Cullen relaxed under the feeling of her lips on his, and he kissed her back gently.

“Thank you,” she said softly, her words almost a whisper.

Cullen lead her up the ladder and to the room above his office. Lori stared up through the holes in the ceiling and at the stars. They were so pretty from the mountains. She’d never had a view this pretty in the Tower.

After taking off her robe the mage couldn’t help but stare at her Templar. He had obviously been in the process of trying to sleep when she interrupted him, as he was only in his smallclothes and a pair of long cloth pants. She felt a pang of guilt for this. Sleep was hard enough for him and she wasn’t helping in the least.

“I’m sorry,” she blurted out, looking away.

Brows furrowed, Cullen looked over at Lori. She was fidgeting with her ring and looking down at the ground. He stepped over to her and took hold of her hands. “What could you possibly be sorry for?”

“I… I feel ridiculous,” she admitted. “It’s just memories, but they hurt. I keep thinking of Redcliffe and Haven and the Fade I just…” Lori felt her throat constrict, as though she were about to start crying.

She let out a choked gasp and Cullen pulled her closer, wrapping his arms around her and kissing the top of her head as he rubbed soothing circles against her back, consoling her as best he could. Lori clutched at the shirt he wore, gripping it tightly as she held back her tears.

“It’s alright, Lori,” he said softly, breathing the words against her ear. “You’re safe here.”

Lori believed him wholly, but it didn’t help how broken she felt on the inside. Her mind felt scarred, fragile, and she hated that feeling.

Cullen led her to his bed, still holding her close as he pulled a sheet over the both of them. Lori buried her face into his chest, breathing in his scent that she’d grown to love so much. The familiarity of it, the good memories it brought forth. Cullen stared through the hole above them, eyes locked on the stars.

“Lori,” he started. She stirred slightly at the sound of his voice. “Look up, please.”

She was hesitant, unsure of what he was doing, but looked up at Cullen anyways. He took hold of her hand.

"Here," he started, lifting her hand and pointing it up at the sky. He went from one star to the next, pointing out a pattern. “You see that group of stars? They’re part of a constellation, Judex, the sword of mercy.” He moved her hand, gesturing from one group of stars to another.

Lori found herself fixated on the sky, listening closely to everything that he said. The sound of his voice was so soothing that she found herself starting to drift. He noticed and brought her hand back down, holding her close.

"The older recruits taught me that trick," he said. "On restless nights all I had to do was look up and focus on the stars."

Lori nodded. "I never had a chance to see the stars in the Circle," she admitted. "I'd read about them, seen drawings. But until I'd left the tower, I'd never seen them as they are. They're beautiful."

"Not as beautiful as you," he said. Lori snorted a laugh at this.

"You think too highly of me," she protested, shifting on her side and getting closer to him. She yawned as Cullen fingered her hair, combing through soft auburn strands.

"Nonsense," he objected. "You are beautiful, whoever says otherwise is either lying or mad."

"Are you sure you're not crazy?" she asked lazily. Her eyes had closed and her breathing was even.

“Not quite,” he said with a smile, kissing the top of her head. Lori sighed contently as she snuggled up against him, relaxing. Cullen held her close, his hand brushing against her soft skin. He wasn’t sure of a number of things, but he was sure that he loved Lori.

 

 

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading~
> 
> Comments are greatly appreciated, but never necessary <3


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